Ramamdan is almost here, 30 more days actually! I’m so excited! But the last few days I’ve been some what distant, lost, and frankly struggling. I can feel it, I can feel Shaiythan around me. He’s certainly up-ed his activity since I kept intention to make this Ramadan better than the last. Alhamdulillah but this time I could see what he was doing. I suppose if I also had some days left before I was tied down for one glorious month, I would make the best out of the time I had left. He knows these are the last few days he can touch us, hurt us and he’s definitely going to use every trick in the book he has to lead us astray while he still can.
Alhamdulillah! This time it was so amazing. Even though I didn’t feel like myself I felt conscious. Even though my whole body kept saying ” It’s ok pray later” I knew in my mind that it wasn’t right. I had another whisper in my head which said “No you must pray now!”. I’m not saying it was perfect. I struggled a lot and I woke up so many times at 7.30am hating myself for not hearing and waking up for my Fajr alarm. Top it, I got the flu as well so it added to my situation. It’s been a tough couple of weeks!
But Alhamdulillah as always Allah is with me! And by the grace of Allah (SWT) I have been once again revitalized! Strengthened for battle and sent out again! I slapped myself (I was ready to physically do it but managed with a threat to my brain :P) into making up my mind and praying steadfastly again! The first day I thought I would do some Zikr by reading the Quran (I say read because, instead of just reciting I try to understand it by reading the translation). After reading a couple of Surahs (which really helped grant me strength, Alhamdulillah!), I just randomly felt like turning to the end of the Quran and reciting Surah Al- Ikhlas, Al – Falaq, and An- Nas. Now I know they are specially Surahs which are recommended to be read before going to bed, etc. But I was never in it’s practice. But that day it bought me so much peace so I recited it after each prayer and Subhanallah! I felt so good! I felt back to normal, I felt like I felt during Ramadan! At peace and totally revitalized!
Alhamdulillah! Now even when I get the slightest “Hey I have time to pray later”, it feels like a joke! I just grin and start taking Wudu, no hesitation! I’ve started reciting the 3 Surah’s after Fajr and Isha, and it’s made me so strong, mashallah. Today I fell asleep forgetting to keep a Fajr alarm (Don’t you hate when that happens?!) and Alhamdullilah Allah granted me mercy by waking me up in time to pray! I just feel so grateful and oh so blessed!
The reason I’m sharing this experience is because I know a lot of my brothers and sisters must go through these hard times where Shaiythan can be overwhelming. Especially now since Ramadan is nearing. I just wanted to share the solution that Allah (SWT) has shown me. Inshallah I hope it works for you as it worked for me.