Random Thoughts

I was just pondering on why it is that when a spouse commits zina, the victim always feels like it was their fault. It’s not logical, we know it, they know it and yet most do it. If there are problems in a marriage then the right thing to do is talk about it like adults, seek help, and if all else fails consider separation or divorce, so why is committing zina seen as a unavoidable outcome of a troubled marriage. If an individual committed zina then it’s their fault, how is the wife or husband to be blamed? They might not have paid attention or been able to satisfy them but surely zina can not be justified can it??

Why is it that at the end of the day the victim feels that it was some sort of unavoidable situation? Like maybe if they did/didn’t do something, said or didn’t say something, maybe if they looked better, maybe if they dressed differently, things would not have happened the way they did. Is it really their fault that their spouse committed zina? I some how find it hard to believe that a morally sound wife or husband who loves for the sake of Allah is at fault if their spouse unfortunately committed zina.

There surely must be some sort of root cause to this deep seeded line of thinking. It’s probably like fairytales which brainwash you with talk of happy endings in unions, you believe (atleast I did) until you grow up and realize happy endings are created by compromise, patience, love, forgiveness and a lot of hard work. They also successfully imply that only a man can save a women from an ill fated curse coz essentially we just look pretty. Stepping away from my original point, how is it that Islam doesn’t promote equality when we have been given the right to work, own, demand with out burdening us too much, but Disney shows us that we should stay locked in a tower till the brave prince comes to save us?

Why does this world not make sense sometimes?!…

Peace!

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